For the longest time, I believed that being busy meant being successful. I wore exhaustion like a badge of honor. My planner was crammed with tasks, my phone buzzed with constant notifications, and I told myself, “This is what productivity looks like.”
But deep down, I was miserable. I felt like I was sprinting on a treadmill — moving fast but going nowhere.
The shift came when I forced myself to slow down. At first, it felt wrong, almost guilty. But little by little, I discovered something surprising: I got more done, and it felt more meaningful.
My Breaking Point
There was one night that changed everything. It was 1:30 a.m., and I was sitting at my desk, eyes burning, trying to finish yet another project I had overcommitted to. My coffee had gone cold hours earlier.
I remember looking at my laptop screen and realizing I couldn’t even process what I was reading. My brain was fried. I burst into frustrated tears, not because of one bad night, but because this had become my normal.
The next morning, I felt hungover from exhaustion. That’s when I thought: If this is success, why does it feel like failure?
That question lingered, and it pushed me to experiment with a different way of living.
The First Experiment: Doing Nothing
I started small. Instead of checking emails the moment I woke up, I sat by my window with tea. I let myself just sit there. No phone. No notebook. Just me and the morning light.
At first, I hated it. My mind screamed: You’re wasting time! But then something shifted. After a week of these slow mornings, I noticed I wasn’t rushing into my day with the same frantic energy. I actually started work calmer, clearer, and more focused.
And that day, I finished tasks faster.
Slowing down, it turned out, didn’t mean I stopped being productive — it meant I stopped being scattered.
The Guilt of Slowing Down
Here’s the truth: at first, slowing down made me feel guilty. Society has drilled into us that hustle = worth. If you’re not constantly “on,” you’re falling behind.
But as I slowed down, I started noticing:
I made fewer mistakes.
I remembered details I would’ve missed before.
I felt less anxious.
The guilt eventually gave way to gratitude. I realized I was finally showing up as my best self, not just my busiest self.
